There are many articles that focus on what you (as a searcher on an online dating website) should do so that other members will be interested enough in you to initiate a conversation. But what if it’s the other way around? What should the other members, specifically the female members, do so that they can catch your attention and prolong the conversation with you? What should they know about what you are looking for so that they can tailor their responses to pique your curiosity?
Foreigners often seek companionship when they sign up with online dating websites. They can’t find what they’re looking for with the women from the same background as them so they’re going to try and see if women from a different racial and cultural background may offer them what they need.
Companionship develops over time and it all starts with compatibility between two people. If you’re the searchee and you think that you have much in common with the searcher, then initiate a conversation starting with your similar interests. You can describe a trip that you took that sounds like something that he should be interested in. Find out what type of books he loves reading if reading books is listed as one of his hobbies. If he’s a fan of movies, try and chat with him about the recent movies that you’ve both seen.
Communication is vital when developing and cultivating a relationship. Granted that if you’re coming from different backgrounds, you may have a slight language barrier but you need to overcome that by learning his language and getting him to learn yours as well. You may even encourage him to teach you and vice versa so that’s something that you can do together, thus, even creating a stronger bond between the two of you.
Appearances also play a major role when choosing a potential partner. Though it may be hard to admit but people do choose based on how they perceive beauty to be. However, there are some people who understand that there’s more than beauty to a person and will usually make it a secondary factor compared to having something in common and being able to communicate well with someone. After all, you have to face the reality that though you may be looking for a dream girl, you yourself may not be looking so hot. So, you also have to manage your expectations.
The only way through this is to put up a nice picture, something that shows you with your interests and passions. It doesn’t really have to be a glamour shot because searchers also become leery of how much the photo has been edited and the reality may not be as pretty. A candid shot is always good because it’s more spontaneous and less likely to be edited.
The bottom line is people click for different reasons and sometimes it may even be unexplainable. You may have to look under a lot of rocks to find that frog that turns into the prince. It’s also going to take a lot of patience especially when all you have to communicate with is online messaging. But you may just be the luckiest of all if you do find that one perfect partner for yourself.
23 Mar 2013